Sat down. Said, “Fuck It, I’m Going To Enjoy This FUCKING Cookie”

So yeah, today I decide – FUCK IT, I’m a little ahead of my work – I’m going to go for a walk.  Get a coffee – take some pictures – USUAL SHIT.  You know…

Well, FUCK IT, I decided to walk all the way to downtown – I was feeling good, FUCK IT – it felt good to stretch the legs.  I don’t have a boss, I – I just wanted to do it, so FUCK IT, I did it.

Well, got to this little outdoor coffee kiosk.

Had about 30 pesos in my pocket – that’s about $2.50.  Taxi back home is 12 pesos – and I sure as HELL WASN’T WALKING another hour and a half back home – so I had, yeah, like 18 pesos to work with.

Bought a galleta avena – or something like that – you know, its like a empanada – THAT’S WHAT IT WAS, RIGHT!!! – filled with, like, caramel for like – NO NO NO, I’m forgetting, I decided to get the galleta – THAT’S RIGHT.  It was 8 pesos.  So I had 4 pesos left to work with.

Sat down.

Said, “Fuck It, I’m Going To Enjoy This FUCKING Cookie”

Not, 2 GOD DAMN SECONDS INTO EATING THIS FUCKING AMAZING COOKIE, a guy – maybe homesless, maybe poor, I don’t know – comes up to me and puts his hand out.  In it was a bunch of change.

I said, “Are you giving me money?”

He said, “Give me money for the bus.” or SOME SHIT LIKE THAT. I Wasn’t Really Paying Attention, to be honest. And I’m always HONEST.

I said, “No.”

He didn’t respond, Just FUCKING STOOD THERE.  I took a bite of my cookie – WHICH WAS STILL FUCKING AMAZING.

2 Seconds… 3 Seconds… I don’t know, maybe 4.  Dude’s STILL FUCKING STANDING THERE STARING AT ME.

I turn my head, look him in the eye –

“You can leave now”, I said MATTER OF FUCKING FACT.

He started walking away – then turned – and yelled out to me, “You SMELL LIKE SHIT”

I said, “what???” or maybe I Didn’t Say Anything – I Don’t Remember – Again, My I Remind You – I Had Just walked like 2 hours and this cookie was making me want to change my pants – if you know what I mean. And I know you know what I mean.

I just got really confused.

He walked a little more, then yelled again – “You SMELL LIKE SHIT” and made a gesture with his hand – waving around his nose.

It really got to me – I would like to say that it didn’t – but EVERY SINGLE PERSON THAT HAS AN OSTOMY IS SELF-CONSCIOUS, AT LEAST A LITTLE BIT, ABOUT THE SMELL!!! JUST A FACT – CUE, “NOW YOU KNOW MUSIC”

I checked the bag – secure, I smelled my shirt – EHH, not garden of ROSES… BUT EHHH not bad… I told myself, let it go – Dude’s an addict in some sense; its not the first time; he’s a drain on society – and he has no sense of personal responsibility – but still its getting to me.

In time – on a side note, I may go buy soap and do laundry but its under my skin.

So dude, wherever you are, I’m going to say a little prayer – “Dear God, Thank You I Am Not Him.” And FUCK YOU, DUDE. DIE. Ok, at least… get in touch with reality. Ok, my rant is done.

So What’s The Point Of This –

Right now, 7 Steps Out of Wage Slavery, is on sale.  Don’t be that guy.  Buy it and #TakeCharge of your MOTHER FUCKING LIFE. You only have one.

Cheers!!! -jamie 😀

QUESTION:

Actually don’t have a question today – maybe other day!!! 😀

Jamie Smith
therenegadeinc@gmail.com

It's all about the story, man.



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